Thursday, August 12, 2004
Unwell
Hmm.
0120 hrs and re-minisce is feeling alert and orientated with some myalgia and a very low grade pyrexia.
Or in other words, I hurt, I have a fever, and I'm awake.
An unexpected side effect of having all this lovely free time to myself has been the time to think. I've been intentionally steering clear of buying new books (was tempted to get I, robot to do a re-read after the movie. A quick skim revealed that the only thing in common between the two were the three rules of robotics) so that I'll be able to spend my days productively walking to places i've never walked, and finishing the epic that Stars and Moon is turning into.
Sometimes thinking is a bad thing, especially at 0130 hrs in the morning, in the still of the night.
You were right. I think too much.
*****
I found this via the eatme guy. or was it agooga?
Flipped through the site a bit and wondered why all members have to pay $20 "registration".
I'm sure there's a reason. Probably to buy Stephen something shiny.
The constitution is laughably funny too. To bring all alumni closer together? There must be a reason why they drifted apart in the first place. It's not as if they're scattered across the face of the globe. We're talking GEP alumni who're still in singapore. Everyone's just a 'phone call away.
Which made me wonder who actually goes to these dinner thingummies anyhow?
Aside from those who feel a burning need to satisfy their morbid curiosities, and bask in Carmee Lim's radiant smile. (ug.)
*****
This isn't exactly me at my best is it. laughs. Everything's a little disjointed, and for some reason I can't write the things I really want to, anymore.
I've been thinking that my life here in London is fast coming to an end. It's a blissful life of solitude, which I enjoy. But the flip side is that if anything ever happened to me, nobody would be any the wiser.
shrug.
*****
I've never really fit in anywhere. I've belonged, without fitting in. It's almost as if I was predestined to lead the life of a loner, inside my own head. I think it ties in with being an odd mix of cynic, and (closet) romantic, and hopefully, empath as well.
Sometimes I watch the others around me with envy - how do they do it? Carve their own little niches of happiness and float deliriously in their little bubbles of joy.
I'm going to leave one city where I didn't quite fit in, to return to one where I'm about as congruent as a square peg, in a round hole. I'm sure I'll survive, and learn to adapt. It'll be mundane, and ordinary. It'll be interesting. It'll be everything I remember, and everything I don't. It'll be... okay.
But the only time I felt that I really belonged somewhere was... shrug.
Water under the bridge.
0120 hrs and re-minisce is feeling alert and orientated with some myalgia and a very low grade pyrexia.
Or in other words, I hurt, I have a fever, and I'm awake.
An unexpected side effect of having all this lovely free time to myself has been the time to think. I've been intentionally steering clear of buying new books (was tempted to get I, robot to do a re-read after the movie. A quick skim revealed that the only thing in common between the two were the three rules of robotics) so that I'll be able to spend my days productively walking to places i've never walked, and finishing the epic that Stars and Moon is turning into.
Sometimes thinking is a bad thing, especially at 0130 hrs in the morning, in the still of the night.
You were right. I think too much.
*****
I found this via the eatme guy. or was it agooga?
Flipped through the site a bit and wondered why all members have to pay $20 "registration".
I'm sure there's a reason. Probably to buy Stephen something shiny.
The constitution is laughably funny too. To bring all alumni closer together? There must be a reason why they drifted apart in the first place. It's not as if they're scattered across the face of the globe. We're talking GEP alumni who're still in singapore. Everyone's just a 'phone call away.
Which made me wonder who actually goes to these dinner thingummies anyhow?
Aside from those who feel a burning need to satisfy their morbid curiosities, and bask in Carmee Lim's radiant smile. (ug.)
*****
This isn't exactly me at my best is it. laughs. Everything's a little disjointed, and for some reason I can't write the things I really want to, anymore.
I've been thinking that my life here in London is fast coming to an end. It's a blissful life of solitude, which I enjoy. But the flip side is that if anything ever happened to me, nobody would be any the wiser.
shrug.
*****
I've never really fit in anywhere. I've belonged, without fitting in. It's almost as if I was predestined to lead the life of a loner, inside my own head. I think it ties in with being an odd mix of cynic, and (closet) romantic, and hopefully, empath as well.
Sometimes I watch the others around me with envy - how do they do it? Carve their own little niches of happiness and float deliriously in their little bubbles of joy.
I'm going to leave one city where I didn't quite fit in, to return to one where I'm about as congruent as a square peg, in a round hole. I'm sure I'll survive, and learn to adapt. It'll be mundane, and ordinary. It'll be interesting. It'll be everything I remember, and everything I don't. It'll be... okay.
But the only time I felt that I really belonged somewhere was... shrug.
Water under the bridge.
