Truths of Old

For the Catholics amongst us, today marks the Feast of the Assumption of Our Lady. Hear me out before switching off, I do have a point. I think.
The sermon today centred about the sanctity of life - all life, no matter how humble or broken. All things great and small, all things bold and meek. All things beautiful, and ugly. In God's eyes, at least, the beautiful, intelligent supermodel is no better than the geriatric, Parkinsonian old woman. With a flourish, and almost as an afterthought, the priest added, "who's also incontinent", bringing all my wonderful memories of life as a medical (as opposed to surgical, or emergency) doctor back to mind.

long pause.

okay, moving swiftly on.

I'd like to thank Londoner for a comment he left on my blog. Since I can't get my permalink function to work (if anyone has any bright ideas, please inform) I'm going to reproduce the whole dang thing here :

Londoner - As you know, I have no connection to Singapore whatsoever. I found your blog following the link from Reynolds' blog. And I kept reading because... well, because you CAN write, and I like how intimately you share your thoughts, and I like your descriptions of London.

I read XiaXue's blog, having followed the link from your blog, and while it is vaguely amusing, I didn't understand what all the fuss was about. She also really put me off Singapore- no offence. But she makes it sound like a nanny state full of mindlessly patriotic, bitchily beautiful, and vaguely silly people. I am not saying this is the truth of the matter, but what with her being apparently the nation's favourite blog...? Um, I dunno. You, however, present a rather more favourable picture.

The point is: I did not read XiaXue's blog after that initial perusal, mostly because of the points you make in your bitchaboutxiaxue.com site or whatever it is. And no, she CAN'T write, and yes, you can.

However, in terms of what I think of the site. I dunno. It seems totally immature to me. But then again, if I was reading it in the context of being a Singaporean who has XiaXue forced down my throat, nah. I probably wouldn't find it QUITE so ridiculous a venture.

And please, PLEASEdon't fall in love with XiaXue. Have some self-respect.

Thanks for taking the time to write all that, Londoner. And unlike Xiaxue, I'm not going to use it as evidence that I'm a fantastic writer - even if 1000 of you wrote the same. laughs. How I see myself is a factor of what people say about me, as well as how I think about myself, and fortunately (or not) - the cynic, and critic within me believes in a more introspective rather than receptive view of the world around him. I might be a prolific writer, but I by no means believe I'm a fantastic one. I rate myself pretty average on an international scale, and (cough) dare I say it, above average on a "local" scale (meaning wrt Singapore). My forte lies more in cutting things into little pieces with sharp instruments a foot and a half long. Beam.

Now where was I.

Ah yes, I was about to launch an attack on the press. Yes, I've had a rethink after today's sermon (God knows why) and I've come to realise that the true demons of society are not the Xiaxues, who will always exist - crass, foul-mouthed, common, and attention-seeking -- but the manipulators of society. The media.

Y'know what, I rather suspect Xiaxue's right. I'm none too bright. I keep banging my head on walls. I wonder if I'll survive my imminent return to Singapore, what with all these new friends I'm making. Twiddle thumbs.

Sometimes I read myself and despair at how disorganised my thoughts have become. I'm a rambler now - I've been a doctor for too long, and out of touch with the debate scene for yonks. Doctors have their own little lingo for communicating with each other, and we forget after a while how to be ordinary folks. Well, folks - this is me trying to speak to you.

*****
There will always be Xiaxue-esque people. They exist the world over - look at the Big Brother hopefuls for one. I wouldn't so much call it a personality defect, as a propensity towards taking the path of least resistance. And I suppose we can't really blame them for it.

Given the history of our country (ie Singapore) since independence, and the ostensibly draconian rule we unwittingly grew up under, sheltered by the protective umbrella of a government that knew better - I guess we really ought to be grateful that all voices are being heard in society now, even the rude, uncouth voices that according to the Straits Times, put Brixton fish-sellers to shame. Odd that... if anything I'da pegged London Cabbies for the most prolifiec swearers in the UK. Hmm. Or maybe the football players. laughs.

The odd thing about Xiaxue is that while being common and crass, she is also cunningly PC - note the way she's staunchly pro singapore, and pro government, and the figures she chooses to make fun of - Tony Tan, that most benign of creatures. Put one foot wrong and cast a slur on one of the Lees, and I rather suspect she wouldn't have made the papers. Or even... well, enough of that. And enough of Xiaxue.

I guess the thing that's always really gotten to me about our country is the media. Like most other presses around the world, ours is keen to iconify and deify. Celebrities attain cult-like status quickly within the shire thanks to the efforts of the press. Everyone wants to be hip, and cool like beautiful Miss X, and hunky Mr Y. Our carefully brainwashed sheep baaa in approval everytime some new fresh-faced public figure is crafted, and suddenly all the girls have a new hairstyle.

Politicians on the other hand attain God-like status. Nobody would be stupid enough to emulate them, and certainly nobody would be dumb enough to criticise them publically.

That's how it was while I was growing up, and I admit I was touched by it too. Local celebrity. Waah. So pretty. Wah. So rich. Wahhh. So completely unlike me. I'll never become anyone like that, what with my ordinary looks and ordinary social standing (insecurity is very much part of being Singaporean, isn't it?)

Funny thing is, when I came over here I found myself unable to look at local celebrities the same way after. Frankly, most of them are slightly less talented than that John Smith's (I think) cardboard cutout figure who at least is funny. And I dunno but somehow that fresh-faced ephemeral look just gets so boring after a while - especially when they ALL look like clones of each other. Given the small pool of supposed "talent", watching TCS shows is quite a pain as well. The same talentless actors crop up over, and over, and over, and over again... today a thrillingly ordinary policeman, tomorrow a less than convincing doctor, the next... etc. How many of them honestly have panache and savoir-faire? How many of them, for that matter have wit? And how many actually have brai... cough. Okay, I won't go there. laughs.

The thing that I resent about our media is that not everybody has a voice. Not everybody gets to enjoy their five minutes of fame (obviously) - this is true in any society. But the top dogs who do the picking and choosing always choose the SAME type of people. Apparently someone up there's had a moment of inspiration. Let's be different, let's choose a teenaged girl who's really foul-mouthed and make her the next best thing since sliced bread!

wow. What an astounding imagination. Someone give the man a Tiger. Heck, throw a nobel peace prize in while you're at it. Preferably in his Tiger.

The thing that bugs me is - where are the other voices? Where're the voices in support of good old fashioned decency, to balance this new, cool, hip rudeness? And I'm not talking about the cliched, prim and proper voices of our grandmothers who, if they had their ways, would have us all (men included) wearing chastity belts with low voltage "re-education" devices incorporated. I'm not talking about the ludicrously anal-retentive Christians the media always delights in choosing as the "other extreme". I'm talking about that decidedly everyday, common sense voice of lay decency that most of the people know, that resides within their hearts.

The thing that's always wowed me about England is that you get All Sorts here. For every pro-war columnist out there, there's at least another anti-war writer - and quite often they appear on opposite pages in the same newspaper. There is a diversity of thought here that appeals. There is a recognition that the truth is quite often subjective - and the people who transform it into particular realities aren't the mediamen, but the readers.

Back home, you get One "Sort", until in-vogue becomes passe, and then we move on to another "Sort". And I don't just mean celebrity figures - it's all pervasive, in nearly everything we take for granted.

Does anyone remember when chewing gum suddenly became illegal?
Where were the public voices to point out, quite matter of factly, that that was just plain stupid?
Instead, we just rolled over and pretty much said "but muuuuuuuuuuuuuum..."

And now that we've got our gum back... where are the voices to say "duuuuuuuuuuurrr!"

And honestly, what message are we trying to give our youth now? Be like Xiaxue? Learn to say fuck fuck fucking fuck at least twice in every line we write? That ruthlessly "slandering" other people and then strutting around after engaging in self-promotion is okay, as long as we're "humourous" while we do it? What about that older message that we're fast forgetting - that swearing (incessantly) is unbecoming, and laughing at other people's misfortunes is ungracious? Are we forgetting how much infinitely more pleasurable it is to laugh along with someone, rather than at him/her?

Aren't we even going to give our kids a choice? We all know by now that they can't really think for themselves - they only think they can. Saturate their minds with a single image for long enough, and they lose their ability to think outside the box - or rather, the less three-dimensional picture-frame. Heck, most of us can barely think for ourselves as it is. (myself included, quite often.)

What happened to our push for a "Gracious Society" anyhow?

The people still remember. It's obvious, reading Sara's account of national day that Goh Chok Tong got a tearful heroes sendoff - and I suspect it wasn't so much because of his Godlike status - he never did wear that mantle, even when the press tried to push it onto him - but more because he was quietly thoughtful and competent, and if not meek - then certainly not arrogant. The gentle giant, soft-spoken almost to the point of diffidence. Someone from another time, almost. (compare to George Bush jr, a genuine, true blue (and red and white) Great American Contemporary Neanderthal for maximum effect.)

I'm trying my best not to let my personal biases come into play here - so I'll reiterate that there will always be people like Xiaxue, and they will always have a role to play within society. They belong - in fact, in America, they appear to predominate. heh.

I don't know, I honestly don't.

The problem is our (selective) media. And there's two ways around it - either they refrain from deifying people, or else they take some responsibility into their hands (or rather, quills. okay, biros.) and become a thinking press that strives to balance fact for fact and icon for icon, and allow the people to make their own minds up about what's hip, what's cool, and what's true. I know one or two of the reporters who used to give a damn about responsible journalism. Where did they slink to, I wonder?

Does anyone remember my rant about that supposed "medical expert" who wrote that all strokes should be thrombolysed? It's fascinating that in Singapore a guy who barely qualified from med school becomes an overnight medical guru, whereas in the UK long-established university professor-clinicians (and not just mere doctors!) are invited to write columns, and have the common sense not to proclaim what they write as law.

Black and white print went out the door eons ago - why then are we still being forced to think in monochrome?

I write all this because for some crazy reason, I care.
It doesn't come across, I suppose, in my many dreamy photologs about London. I'm the proto-globalvillager. The neo-citizen with tenuous allegiances, who makes his home where his heart wants to. Someone like, sigh, Xiaxue on the other hand is staunchly nationalistic - her country is her country, because its her country and she will defend it to the death. She will defend her masters land and words from the evil foreigners.

And I don't know why I should care. Except, as Nicholas put it on his blog (metastasis) - Singapore is our home because we live there, with our families. The things we truly care about are friends and family. The rest of it - what our government would like us to think is a given - is really an optional extension. Caring for the country itself, and the fate of the country - that's a completely different matter.

I know that I'm a critical thinker - although quite probably not the keenest of the lot. It's nothing to be proud of - and once upon a time it was something to be ashamed of, as according to the PAP. Does anyone remember the days of yesteryear when it took the offensive against "cynics"? Evil people who would bring down the empire? Anyone who thought critically was automatically a cynic.

The people I cared most about were critical thinkers - the people I called my friends, once.

The funny thing is most of them have left the country to take up permanent residence in the states. And, inevitably, time and work committments eroded our friendships till today they're mere whispers in the wind.

Yet something bugs me about it all. I want for Singapore to grow - in the right direction. I want for the people to learn to think critically for themselves - whether or not they choose to exercise that capability would be entirely up to them. But like the matrix - shouldn't everyone be given a chance to see outside their box? To decide which reality suits them better.

I've almost given up hope of this ever happening. To be honest, as Gandalf said, there never really was much hope - only a fool's hope.

And it's entirely imaginable, given the current trend that one day I'll be forced to turn my back on my country of birth. I, renegade.

But right now, right this moment - I still burn.

Is this so hidiously unpatriotic of me? What, one wonders went through Lee Kuan Yew's mind once upon a time, after he graduated from a UK university and went home, to change the way his people thought? Was he being unpatriotic then?

Corny as this sounds - I'd like to sound a clarion call to the people who really do give a damn about their country, and who don't just parrot the noises. Let us call for a shred of responsibility from our media. Let us call for "revolution".

Err and just in case Big Brother misunderstands me - I'm not calling for a change of government. I'm calling for a "new paradigm" of thought as you guys so often love to call it. I'm calling for a re-realisation of the ideals the New Singapore was founded upon, once.