Sunday, February 29, 2004
Hic
I'm probably a little bit pissed as I write this. I've only had about, oh 15 units to drink.
Another night in the pleasant company of 8 females and 1 other bloke getting pleasantly drunk. I chose to work feverishly on my PE presentation during that time instead of making small talk, since I don't seem to be able to make eyes, and small talk, at will anymore. The odd occasions when I popped out to grab a bite I spent watching everyone else getting pleasantly drunk. As a result, my host served me drinks 4 times more potent than anyone else's.
The night culminated in a club visit. Everyone else (all female by this time) started gyrating slinkily to the music.
I watched.
After a while, I left.
They won't understand; they probably think I haven't got it in me. And they're right. I can't dance alone - heck, I can sort of ceroc. With gusto.
But I can't. Not anymore. I feel empty, and drained, watching everyone else shed their masks.
This is not me. I am :
Missing. You.
Still.
And teetering at the brink of... what exactly? I don't know. Are You really here?
I'm. Tired of this. And yet I'd appreciate any help I can get. Except that - I can't ask for any. Not from anyone.
Not from You.
And so, Tomorrow, when the alcohol wears off (and that will come soon, since I'm drowsy+++) - I will forget. By choice.
Oh yes. And in other news, my computer has risen from the dead. I will never switch it off again. Ever.
I'm probably a little bit pissed as I write this. I've only had about, oh 15 units to drink.
Another night in the pleasant company of 8 females and 1 other bloke getting pleasantly drunk. I chose to work feverishly on my PE presentation during that time instead of making small talk, since I don't seem to be able to make eyes, and small talk, at will anymore. The odd occasions when I popped out to grab a bite I spent watching everyone else getting pleasantly drunk. As a result, my host served me drinks 4 times more potent than anyone else's.
The night culminated in a club visit. Everyone else (all female by this time) started gyrating slinkily to the music.
I watched.
After a while, I left.
They won't understand; they probably think I haven't got it in me. And they're right. I can't dance alone - heck, I can sort of ceroc. With gusto.
But I can't. Not anymore. I feel empty, and drained, watching everyone else shed their masks.
This is not me. I am :
Missing. You.
Still.
And teetering at the brink of... what exactly? I don't know. Are You really here?
I'm. Tired of this. And yet I'd appreciate any help I can get. Except that - I can't ask for any. Not from anyone.
Not from You.
And so, Tomorrow, when the alcohol wears off (and that will come soon, since I'm drowsy+++) - I will forget. By choice.
Oh yes. And in other news, my computer has risen from the dead. I will never switch it off again. Ever.
